Fic: Euphoria (see header for pairings and warnings, NC-17, PWP)

[birdsofshore]

Claiming my hp_crossgenfest fic \o/

Title: Euphoria
Author: birdsofshore
Pairing(s): Draco/Albus Severus, Albus Severus/Scorpius, Draco/Albus Severus/Scorpius *hides face* I'm so sorry.
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: ~22,500
Content/Warnings: Where do I start? It's a 22k PWP. O_O. Serious consent issues, sex under the influence of alcohol and potions, voyeurism, a threesome, jealousy, a little angst, infidelity kink, orgasm delay, powerplay, wanking, really quite a lot of anal sex, kind-of incest, a tiny bit of H/D UST, age disparity 19/45.
Summary: A fire is prickling in the pit of my belly. I feel a little like I'm watching this happening to someone else. Al's sitting there, reeking of another man's sweat and come. He looks miserable and anxious... but also well-fucked. I look at his mussed hair, his bitten lips. I've never wanted him more.
Author's Notes: Thank you so much to my wonderful betas, who_la_hoop and lumosed_quill, for bravely grappling with 20k of my perverted filth. :D Many thanks also to capitu, for sterling support from the sidelines, and to gracerene for being super-flexible with deadlines. ♥

I prompted a simplified version of this at hp_crossgenfest and then the whole smutty scenario took over my brain and I became its slave until I had written, well, this. I thought it was going to be a breezy, Oh! Those Malfoys! They're so BAD kind of thing, but then I started writing Scorpius' POV and, omg, I was sunk. I got really really involved with the jealousy kink, and I indentified with Scorpius so so much, and it took me a while to realise that it was related to some stuff from my own RL. Don't worry, though, Mr Birds is not cheating on me with my dad. :D Once I realised, I found it hard to carry on, but in the end it was quite cathartic to write it all out and give everyone involved the happiest ending I could manage.

The other thing I need to state here is that I was actually pretty horrified and ashamed by the sheer volume of kinky smut that came pouring out when I wrote this. I'm still not quite sure how this happened. But I'm terribly grateful that people have been kind about it, and even quite enthusiastic, rather than suggesting some kind of intervention. THANK YOU! ♥

Euphoria

Comments

[besamislabios]

I hope it's okay to say this but since you're mentioning the jealousy kink, I have to say that those moments were not easy to read. I especially remember that scene when Scorpius is standing in front of Draco's closed door, knowing full well what's going on behind it, you captured that unpleasant feeling amazingly well. :)

[birdsofshore]

Oh, of course it's OK to say that! I'm so sorry it was difficult - do you think the warnings were clear enough? I'm glad in a way that I captured the feeling well, because writing for this was quite powerful for me and helped to lay a few things to rest. It's not sexual jealousy or anything that anyone else would connect with this story, but it did tap into something big for me and I guess a lot of those feelings came out through the characters' expereiences.

[besamislabios]

Oh yes, they are perfectly clear and I read them before reading, so don't feel like you didn't warn enough. I mentioned it because you mentioned it. :D
but really you captured all the feelings very well, there are so many scenes that are stuck in my head, it's a brilliant fic, way more than just a pwp.

[birdsofshore]

Ah that's good to know. I don't really like to torture people, but at the same time, I wanted to do that part justice. Thanks so much for your thoughtful words <3